2004-03-07

Ladies and Gentlemen, it is 71 degrees out. We have arrived!

This morning I woke up to some very strange, loud meowing. I stumbled into the kitchen to discover a tiny, beautiful, long-haired, blue-eyed cat crying away. She ran over to me, purring, and rubbed against my legs. When I pet her I knew she was another feral. Fur and bones. Bones bones bones.

We leave the back door open when we're home so the cats can travel at their leisure. Our back yard is small with very tall gates that lead to our neighbors tall-gated back yards. Cats sometimes scale the walls. Not mine, though. They've got it too good to jump ship.

Of course I say they because, for those who are new to Betaland (welcome!), Little McFatty, feral cat numero uno, is mine all mine. No, I still can't pet her. But she sleeps on my bed, eats my food and gives good lickin' lovin' to Calamity C*lam.

I digress. So, I'm petting this cute little cat and I discover ANOTHER cute cat hanging out by our washing machine. What insanity is this?

Four cats are staring at me. God are they cute. So what do I do? I think you all know the answer.

I fed them.

Bad Beta.

The tabby by the washing machine was not into it. Woo hoo! A well fed cat that must belong to someone else! My pretty little meow machine wolfed it down and came back for more. Little McFatty and Claymation kept close watch. I went back to bed.

Today, as I've been cleaning the bathroom, making the grocery list, and doing other sundry tasks, the newest addition to the Betabitch Foodbank Project followed me and, guess what, meowed.

All day.

This might prove to be trouble. That is, if she didn't keep jumping in my lap, rolling over and purring while I try to write this. God help me, I can't resist! I'm a senile cat lady at 28. My destiny has been determined.

And now! Here's Calamity C*lam and Mister C*lyde:

But Claymay is a ho', sleepin' with any peep he can pass out on. May I present Little McFatty in the roll of the stay-the-fuck-away-from-me pussy. This is her first internet appearance:

Apologies for the photo quality. You get the idea. I'm surrounded by fuzz.