2003-10-19

Shitty fuck, chitlens. Today I went to a nursery and bought plants, flowers and dirt. I then continued to dazzle the world by planting four window boxes and, for my encore, hanging them.

I didn�t know I was that dykey. Dykey? Dyky? Whatever. Guess it�s time to visit the healing tree and the golf course.

I water my plants once a week, but I don�t know what they are, what they need or, quite frankly, why they continue to subsist under my ignorant eye. I�m no Marvelous Marn, who not only could kick your ass Xena-style, but who also speaks gardenese fluently. Marn tells mother nature she ain�t nobody�s bitch. I, however, am most certainly the mother�s Bitch. Ass. Submissive. Bottom.

So anyway, deciding what to buy for these boxes was enough of an embarrassing and humbling experience, but to do it? Sweaty and dirty was I. Just the way you like your bitches.

I�m not posting pictures because it is in reality a minute accomplishment. I�m just hoping those little snowbanks and other assorted perrenials (look, Pa, they learned me good!) get to gossiping with the ole timers and figure out what it takes to survive in this skanked out town.