2004-06-14

Hello my little chickadees. Life as been chug chug chugging along, and in between my own chug chug chugging of booze I've been doing some other stuff. It's true, there seems to be enough time in the week for forward momentum towards my life goals as well as regular public intoxication. God bless.

I had my orchestra concert yesterday, which went fairly well. We played (pretend you care) Ravel's Piano Concerto in G with a bouncy old lady who smiled the whole time she tickled the ivories. Falla's El Amore de Brujo, a funky Spanish gypsy dreamscape of a piece. And a premiere of a jazz concerto by the sax soloist who performed it.

That was a bit of chaos. His entourage included some phenomenal musicians: a drummer, bassist and pianist. Our instructions were along the lines of "hold this note for as long as we feel like soloing" and "play this 8 bar phrase 16 times, or more if we decide to stretch it." All in all, it was super cool. I was practically on the drummer's lap.

I've been interviewing some sexy folks too. I got my favorite fetish model to sign on, and I had a pretty intelligent email discussion with B*uck Angel, a self proclaimed "guy with a pussy." He's a tranny, but instead of being a feminist fighting for the worker's unions, he's gone and made a porn star of himself. Really, folks, click the link and check it out. It forces you to question the rigid (hee) definitions of gender, sexuality and hot. Fuck yeah, those are my favorite questions!

Eh, what was I saying? Pussy?

We've got our Virgin CD release party next week, but if you can't wait, you can go here to listen to samples and buy it through Amazon or Tower. I LOVE YOU!

God, when will I shut up?

The danger of going so long in between updates is that now I really wanna UPDATE, to document this time in my life. Usually I just like to swear a lot and tell you dirty sex facts, but now, suddenly I'm all "Yeah, substance, mememe, bad ass."

So here are some penis facts to even it all out. Be sure to amaze your friends with them at your next high-class affair:

The six-inch long Alpine banana slug has a thirty-two inch penis.

The shovel-shaped penis of the dragonfly scoops out the sperm of other suitors.

The sperm of a mouse is longer than the sperm of an elephant.

The six-inch long Alpine banana slug has a thirty-two inch penis.

A gorilla's penis is a mere two inches long.

Well, I feel better.